my dream is my reality; my reality is my dream

So i was told.

I was never this scared in my whole life. Maybe that's really how it is when you start sticking with the sad chain of life.... the written details, the planned endings. Maybe this is how it really feels when you see how it ends for you.. The most scariest thing in life would be this.. Reality.

It's the infamous "bahala na".. the damned excuse of "that's just the way it works, this is life". It's the playing safe. It's the slow surrender. It's the fatal but unseen mistake of giving up. It's reality.

But then again, why is it that whenever we say reality, we think almost immediately that it's the right one? Is it because reality tends to be or is supposed to be REAL? Then real is not good? Real is not forever? Real is not a promise?

We always end up drawing that really big line between reality and dreams. But how about the middle, that in between, that place where we draw the line. Whatever happens to that? There is such a place. That is why people unmistakeably take, at some point of their lives, reality into dream and dream into reality. I'm sure of that because i've been there.. fascinated always by the feeling of total happiness like a dream and then the instant realization that it is happening in the real world. Not when i'm sleeping. Not when i'm thinking, losing my attention, daydreaming. Sometimes, it doesn't even take a slightest bit of hoping, whatever you do when you dream. It's for real; a dream is for real.

It's always been good to be there in the middle. You see endless possibilities.. good and bad ones. Too much of the good, you're way too dreaming. Too much bad, there you are, slowly siding with the other one.

Maybe it helps... helps to make it less painful when you have your ends. Does it?


I fought with destiny once.. with fate. Now i think i'm about to fight with reality. Because i think being realistic doesn't mean losing all those happy stuff that we see as dreams. Being realistic doesn't mean just settling for now and letting the rest happen by itself. Being realistic doesn't mean losing faith and hope in what you believe, just because they seem to be so farfetched.

They look far and impossible when all you think about is the facts.

I've been sucked up in the other side. But i think i'm willing to fight for my place in the middle again. I can't stand giving up and just letting whoever write the story for me. I get the challenges and all that pain. But making it all laid down for you? Then it's never gonna be your story anymore.

I fight for what i believe. Even if i stand alone. Because i believe and i have faith in having the happiness that i have now, until the day i die.

Reality, bring it on.